Next issue of Nylon. I might have to buy it and read it inside a copy of Metal Hammer, or something suitably BITCHING so no-one knows how much of a tool I am.

Pic c/o ONTD

This is the first London Fashion Week in time that I've not been involved with in any professional capacity. On the one hand I'm kind of bummed, because despite the hard work (NO REALLY), it is a whole bundle of fun, and being positively encouraged to drink at 8:30am is something I am definitely down with. On the other hand, I'm not too bothered about missing out on the whole traipsing from Zone 1 to Zone 6 wearing stupid shoes, just to stand at the back of a cold warehouse or whatever making endless notes about shows that I don't really care about, but have too much respect for my employees to slate.



With that in mind, it's quite nice to write about just the shows I want, for no-one's amusement but my own (and yours). This is my first season focussing solely on hair and beauty, and luckily there's been a lot of above shoulder action over the past week which I'll come to at some later point. So, here's the first show I give a shit about and have chosen to say a few words about; PPQ. I wont lie, the main reason I was excited about PPQ was to see Daisy Lowe's face. Would the heartbreak show? Would she show? How, indeed, was the show?



More hats, which is good news for me. Lovely ice cream colours everywhere. Princess Jasmine veils and (told you) harem pants. Sounds a bit all over the place, but was actually nicely succint and coherent. The frame print dresses kinda came out of nowhere (I swear Jeremy Scott did that exact print at some point), but they were cute. And as for Daisy? Hmm, well she looked pretty miserable, but that's understandable. Didn't rate her dress much, and I hear she fell over a bit too. I've done a bit of a 180 on her now. Poor gal. I wonder what other shows she'll pop up in?

As far as I'm concerned, Hilary 'Fresh Prince' Banks is right up there with Alexis Carrington and Denise Huxtable as fetch women with wardrobes of power. With that in mind, when I saw this dress on Ebay today, all I could think of was Hils. If you're a little more waif like than I am, you should totes bid on this. What a woman.

It's nigh on impossible to find a decent picture of Hilary, or Karyn Parsons as she's really known. How come so many of these girls ended up doing Playboy? As it is, enjoy this clip of Hilary's first appearance on the show. Loving the hat.

Oh hai Beyonce. Man, I really didn't want to be the one to tell you but... seriously? I mean, this isn't working for you. At all. You're hot and everything, but these outfits are basically a no. Seriously, I get what you're aiming for but it's just... no. Not working.



Shiiit. Sorry dude. Really, I am sorry to have to be the one to tell you. But someone had to. Shit.



Pictures from ONTD, obviously. See the whole sorry state here.

CONGRATULATIONS!



You have successfully invented this season's new silhouette!



Mary Poppins hats, bustles, ankle length?? Why u so crazy, Marc? God bless.